How to find a new mental health therapist

Finding the right mental health counselor or therapist can be a daunting task. Add to the depression, overwhelm and exhaustion you’re already feeling, now find someone who will accept your insurance, has availability when you can find the time and with whom you feel comfortable to share your feelings and problems? 

Where do I start?

I have now had the experience of looking for and interviewing possible new therapists for my own healing work as well as being on the other end, consulting with possible new clients to be their new therapist. One’s mental health is serious business and it should be treated as such.

So how does one go about finding a new therapist? 

There are a few ways I have tried and had success. First, I would definitely ask trusted friends or health care providers, like your acupuncturist, who referred me to my last therapist.  

Mental Health Directories, Online Search and Helpful Filters

Another suggestion is to visit the numerous online search directories, like Psychology Today, Therapy Den or locally, Portland Therapy Center, which have a vast listing of local therapists. You can filter your search by gender, insurance provider, specialties, issues, price and more. Some profiles have videos. Here is my Psychology Today listing.

I recently went through this process. I searched via insurance and then gender as I prefer to work with a female (although that wasn’t always the case and I have had great success working with men in the past, but that is a separate blog post). I read a bit of their bio, their specialties and visited their website if they had one. I narrowed down to three options and emailed them. I scheduled two consultations but one had to cancel for personal reasons. The third did not reply, which I took to mean that she is full and not accepting new clients. During the pandemic, many therapists are overwhelmed and so not receiving a reply, while it may feel unprofessional, it wasn’t personal and I moved on to the ones who did respond. 

If a therapist replies that they are full, it is absolutely acceptable to ask if they have any referrals for other clinicians. As a new therapist, I am often responding to requests for clinicians with openings, so definitely ask. 

What Should I Ask When Interviewing Mental Health Therapists?

I meet with people who are ready to begin therapy and are interviewing me to be their therapist. So what is it like on the other side? I offer a free consultation which I have found to be a good opportunity to get a sense of the client and their reasons for seeking therapy and if we both feel we want to establish a therapeutic relationship. It’s an opportunity to answer their questions about me, my experience and what it would be like to work with together.  Here are a few questions I suggest asking the person you will be sharing your private feelings and history with:

• Are you currently in therapy for yourself?  (I believe we all benefit from talking to someone no matter what and many therapists are also receiving supervision and consultation with other professionals).
• How do you manage the stressors of the pandemic? It’s a strange time as we are all experiencing similar issues and therapists cannot ask our clients to do things we ourselves are not also doing to support our mental health. 
• How are sessions organized? What can I expect? For example, I begin most sessions with a few minutes of mindfulness to settle in and arrive. 
• What specializations or training have you done? Most states require Continuing Education so ask what the therapist is currently learning and what areas they have extensive knowledge or training in.
• How can you help me? Have you worked with other clients with similar issues? 

The Most Important Thing

Research shows that 50-70% of the success of a therapeutic relationship comes down to the connection between the counselor and the client. That’s right! It’s not the training, a specific degree, or the years of experience that matter most. It is the level of trust, care, ally-ship and connection you feel with the therapist, the therapeutic alliance. If you feel judged or are worried about the reaction of your therapist when you tell them something, research shows that you will likely not have success with the issues or problems you came to therapy to work towards. 

With my previous therapist, I cannot specifically remember the interventions she used with me or what she said, but I know she cared for me. I felt her unconditional empathy and positive regard for me and my well being. So, the most important thing is, do you feel comfortable with this person? Do you feel compassion and care? Do you feel that you can eventually trust this person to tell them about the parts of your life that are painful, that are frightening, that no one else knows? Sometimes it takes a few tries to find the right therapist for you. Sometimes it takes a few sessions to determine if this is the right fit.  Don’t give up. Finding the right therapist for YOU can be the most rewarding experience.